Featured Coach: Jazmine Clark

Each week FAM Features a coach from our community, so we can get to know them and learn from their experiences.

Fast Facts

Name: Jazmine Clark

From: Michigan Primary Values: Empathy, rehabilitation, creativity, education

Area of Expertise: Limerence, CPTSD and Porn Addiction

Q&A

Why did you get into coaching? I want to give the advice and kindness I didn't receive when I needed help the most. I want to help other people rebuild themselves, it is energizing and rewarding for me to see this transformation.

What is your philosophy/style/approach? My coaching is journalling centric, there is a lot of power in writing out what you're going through. I want my client to write as much as they want to me, then I give informed feedback on it during our sessions and advice on where to go from there.

What book had the biggest change in your life and what did you learn from it? If I had to pick one book, it would be Guns Germs and Steel by Jared Diamond. This book taught me how people and culture are shaped by their environment and this informs my coaching.

Describe your biggest failure and what you learnt from it. My biggest failure was investing too much hope into my pathological upbringing. No amount of achievement or anything else was going to make that situation a healthy one, and this loss was heavy for many years. However, I've learned quite a lot from this loss. I've learned the value of my time, my health and resources. I've learned how fragile many things in life can be. Most of all though, I've learned the value of healing and compassion and how to see the beauty of life through the pain.

Describe your biggest success and how you achieved it. My greatest success, the one that mattered the most, was when I sobered up to the reality of my upbringing back then and cut ties to flee into homelessness to make it to my ill partner before our time was up. I gave up hope for my now estranged relatives to have hope to help my partner and I so we could make content to help others heal too. I achieved this by following my true values and calling despite the slim odds of success, it was a goal worth failing if it came down to that.

What’s one piece of advice you think everyone should follow? Learn and follow your core values.

How do you handle stress? Well there's polyvagal exercises, acupressure desensitization, gardening, dancing to some jams, cold showers/baths, calming teas, TRE, progressive relaxation, THC/CBD, cardio, weightlifting, stretching. There's more but I am blanking a bit here.

How do you prioritise and manage your time? I have a schedule that I follow daily and alarms on my phone to notify me of the next scheduled activity.

How do you stay healthy? I have a treadmill and gym equipment around the house, cronometer helps me keep track of my eating habits, I have exercise apps on my phone, I meditate nearly daily.

What does happiness mean to you? I think the word happiness is dangerously vague. Self actualization doesn't mean everlasting happiness, and the pursuit of happiness can lead to addiction and other destructive behaviors. Radical acceptance is a more constructive goal. When you accept reality at face-value (this isn't the same as agreeing with it, only acknowledging it for what it is), you're in a better position to improve your life in a healthy and sustainable way. Happiness is a beautiful thing, but it is fleeting by nature.

What does success look like to you? Success takes many forms, but in short I believe success is how closely one is living up to their personal values. It doesn't have much to do with money or status, but how aligned your life is with your core values.

Describe your future self. I've healed up most of my CPTSD symptoms and I'm making great online self-help infotainment content with my partner that helps others heal too.

What are some of your core beliefs/guiding principles? I value rehabilitation and caregiving, this has guided me this far.

Describe the best transformation you witnessed in someone. The best transformation I've witnessed thus far was seeing my partner and I in the mirror. We were in horrible shape back in 2014 when I first arrived here. I was 310lbs, my partner was anorexic and struggling to taper off of Ativan. It was a 24/7 nightmare with our combined CPTSD symptoms. We struggled through psychosis together to make our online courses, each year we dug in deep to earn ways to heal. I see us now, and I am grateful for the privilege to heal with her.

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