Notes on: Use These Phrases to Sound More Emotionally Intelligent at Work (and in Life)

'Use These Phrases to Sound More Emotionally Intelligent at Work (and in Life)' is an article by Sarah Showfety and was originally published on lifehacker.com.

Never underestimate the power of telling someone that you’re listening.

People are less likely to stick to jobs and in relationships where they do not feel heard and valued. People want to surround themselves with teammates, managers and friends who exhibit self-awareness, empathy and humility.

Emotional intelligence is the awareness, evaluation, interpretation and management of emotions in yourself and others, and using the information to take control in a positive way. Developing this skill can help you become a better communicator and improve both working and personal relationships and satisfaction.

9 Phrases Used by Emotionally Intelligent Leaders:

1. "I'm listening" / "I hear you" / "I understand". If it is not obvious by your body language, then making eye contact and using these phrases can reinforce to the other person that you are paying attention and make them feel validated.

2. "Tell me more". This signifies a commitment to clarity and a deeper understanding of what is being shared.

3. "I appreciate you". This is another way of saying "thank you" and "good job" with extra emphasis on gratitude for the person.

4. "I trust you". Telling someone you trust them builds morale and shows you have confidence in their decision making or skills.

5. "What are your thoughts?" / "Am I missing anything?" / "What's your opinion?" Soliciting others' opinions shows you have humility and do not pretend to know everything and it also shows you care about inclusivity.

6. "I have a different perspective". This phrase avoids tension caused by more direct responses like, "I disagree" or "With all due respect", while still allowing you to express respectful disagreement.

7. "Is everything OK?" If a colleague or friend isn't behaving to the expected standards, checking in on them shows you prioirtize their wellbeing.

8. "I'm sorry". Expressing remorse towards someone you may have harmed can help build the relationship through trust.

9. "Thanks for (your) understanding". We tend to apologize unnecessarily in some situations and whereas "I'm sorry" focuses on your feelings, focusing on their understanding shifts the perspective on to the other person.